Where all da white women at?!

....because apparently, I have been told that is ALL I will date by some know-it all sistahs at the j-o-b.

I want to say congrats to the two chickenheads for providing me with the MOST unintelligent conversation I have had ALL. YEAR. Granted, that is a pretty tall accomplishment, considering what I do for a living, but yes, sweet merciful jesus, it has happened. Capping off 2006 with some straight up ignorance! Awesome.

So as the conversation went, I will only (and according to them, have in the past, even though they do NOT know me from outside work) date white women. Fact of the matter is, I will date any woman of any race, as long as they are good to me (hahaha and meet some notoriously high standards). According to them, I am too proper. I speak like "whitefolk" (Duuuuddde....I totally didnt think so...that's gnarly!). I like to dress nice, because I prefer some good ol' Banana Republic (it NEVER goes outta style) to Sean John. I drive a BMW (didn't they know that stands for Black Man Working? Hell, at least the car is black LOL). I am always doing "white" things like vacationing to London (of course they wouldnt state the fact that I have been to Africa more times than they could imagine) or eating at Chipotle and La Madeline. I like to read. I like using large words from time to time. If giving all that up means that I will have to stop dating white women, than forget it! Bring on the tannest, tallest, blondest Swede fresh off the boat from Stockholm and let's do this!

As amusing (and aggrevating as this was), I kept asking these girls why do they think this, especially when, again, they know nothing about me outside of work. I have never even alluded to the idea that I exclusively date white women (which again, I DON'T). The only answer they could come up with was because of all the aforementioned attributes ("you best stop usin' dem million-dollar wordz, niiiiggga....stay true to yo' self....stay TRUE"). People like me are "bougy" (sp?) because I carry myself a certain way, and don't necessarily subscribe to their way of thinking. One of them even straight-up told me "I wouldn't date you, not because you ugly, but because of yo' upbringin' and yo' bougieness and stuff".  I almost fell.out. Baby girl, I dont want you, EITHER. With your three kids and five possible daddies and your current baby-daddy in the pen in Huntsville and your BUSTED weave and low expectations on life? Oh, trust and believe, we would NEVA be together. Neva EVVA!

Now this is not the first time I have heard this, nor my sisters, or anyone else who is black and doesn't fit into this stereotypical mold of "blackness" that the media, and unfortunately, black americans, encourage. It is very disturbing to me, and if I could wave a magic wand to get rid of this perpetual ignorance, I would. If one speaks with aplomb (ai'ight nukka..dem wordz again!) or carries themself in a certain manner that is contrary to what most would think is appropriately black, then do not worry about it. Because at the end of the day, their SKIN. IS. BLACK. Just like white folks or mexicans or asians or whatever race there is, there is room on this Earth for low class blacks, middle class blacks, and upper-crust blacks. Blacks who like rap; blacks who prefer Chopin. Blacks who like fried chicken; blacks who like mayonnaise sandwiches. Caddilac's vs Beamers; the south side vs uptown. Because, also, at the end of the day-we are PEOPLE. And people like different stuff. It's that simple.

My advice to our people who make a big deal of this is: unless you see one of our brown brethren in the middle of the street trying to bleach the ebony off of themselves,  let it be. People like my sistah-girls at work, they are more of the norm than the exception regarding this issue. Try as you might to educate them, some will get it, most will not. This is a real deep-seated issue that has its roots all the way back to slavery (you know, the house Negro that could read and right, blah blah blah), so no, it will endure for a little while, of course.

Its almost 2007. Black folk, we have been screaming diversity since the 50's and 60's. Now its time to accept diversity within ourselves.

Word to ya mutha (ooooooo....someone PLEASE tell me if that's black enough! I try soooooooo hard!)